Daily
Updates
Keep up to date with the intrepid quartet on their
travels whilst on the ride by visiting this page. You'll see details
of where they got to, how many miles they did, if any one got lost and any
other events on their journey. We'll endeavour to get pictures on
the page, but that will depend on how knackered we are during the
day.
Start Day minus 1 - Sunday 13th June 2004 - to
John O'Groats
Left this morning just after 8, waiting for Gooner to
get his arse out of the bog after a curry last night. At time of writing,
13:20, we are just leaving Glasgow on the A80 heading towards the
M80. It is difficult to type whilst in a military spec Land Rover traveling
at 60mph with a trailer and 3 fat blokes in the back. Hope to be at
John O'Groats in time for the footie.

Trusty Transport to Scotland and
they're off!

Nearly there and the training is still
going well!
Day 1 - Monday 14th June 2004 - John
O'Groats to Balintore
After the shocking England result we
were of the opinion that things could only get better!
We woke to a wet John O'Groats – as wet as Heskey’s attempt at a
tackle in the 90th minute!
From the Guesthouse we made the 1 mile journey down to the John
O'Groats sign post for the traditional photo call.
We soon left the drizzle behind us and headed into the “prevailing
winds” – now we did expect a bit of wind – hey, we are in the
Scottish Highlands!
What we didn’t expect was gusts of up to 80 mph and having to pedal
DOWNHILL!
To say it was horrendous would be an understatement. After 6 and a half
hours on the go we managed to leave the winds behind and find some very
heavy rain.
On the technical side of things – Matt’s rear derailleur snapped
causing damage to his chain and back wheel – Bobby B and his Q.R.V.
(Quick Response Vehicle) to the rescue.
All in all it was an awful first day – totaling 98 miles at an
average speed of a mere 10.2mph. That is over 9 and a half hours in the
saddle during a day that started at 0800 and finished at 2130! Knackered,
wet, sore and hungry – the only light at the end of the day was the
B&B – the Rowchoish in Balintore. Jackie stayed up and made sure we
were all fed and watered and ready for tomorrow. She also kindly informed
us that the weather forecast for tomorrow is equally as dismal as today.
Bugger!
Stats
Time in saddle 9 hours 38
minutes
Miles 98.46 miles
Average Speed 10.2 mph
Time of departure 0820
Time of arrival 2130
Max Speed 38.5 mph

They
really are there! OK let's get started.
Day 2 - Tuesday 15th June 2004 -
Balintore to Fort William
As some singer said once, “What a difference a day makes, 24 little
hours”
After a sleep and some super hospitality at the B&B, we were in
buoyant mood – thinking that things really couldn’t be as bad as
yesterday.
The weather was fair and brightened throughout the day – the wind was
consistent with our expectations but nowhere near as bad as yesterday.
The routing today was fair and could be described as “undulating”.
The majority of the day was spent aside the Lochs and what a sight. The
views and scenery were absolutely superb.
Just over the half way mark we were met by Bobby B for hotdogs and
refreshments (see picture) – where would we be without him!?
A few running repairs on the bikes and it was off for the second half
of the day.
The team split into two pairs – more suited to each others pace.
Dazzlin and Gooner went ahead – finishing just over an hour before Matt
and Cuzman.
The extra hour COULD have given us more beer drinking time but Gooner
seemed more intent on talking to his missus (and still I wait for beer!)
We are looking forward to a much shorter day tomorrow – even though
it is up hill – so that combination equals beer and a lie-in.
Until tomorrow I bid you a farewell.
Stats
Time
in saddle 7 hours 37 minutes
Miles
98.25 miles
Average
speed 12.9 mph
Time
of departure 0850
Time
of arrival 2000
Max
speed 34.3 mph

Ready for more pain? - Gooner don't do
it! - Grub up
Day 3 - Wednesday 16th June 2004 -
Fort William to Crianlarich
Last night went out in Fort William for
a monster Chinese and a few beers. Had a lie in this morning due to
the forecast low mileage today, en route passed through Glen Coe and many
other hills. Plenty of UP and a far bit of down.
Wind was fortunately behind us for most
of the route but what can I say about the rain, 'It's the middle of
f*****g June for Christ's sake'. It absolutely chucked down with
little left that's still dry. Dazzlin would like to make the
following threat, "If anyone from 'down south' complains about the
weather, I will personally come down and poke you in the eye .......
twice".
From this rant it is taken that the
weather has been better!
Big thank you to Bob Bowerman again
today for the delightful lunch of hot dogs and mushroom soup cooked in the
back of the Q.R.V. Landy.
Injuries sustained so far are:
Gooner - Old football injury in his knee
has flared up
Cuz - Old football injury in both knees!
(Always has to go one better)
Dazzlin - Old football injury in his
ankle
Matt - Arse is ripped to shreds!
Looks like the Japanese flag.
Stats
Time
in saddle - Lost track of that one
Miles 58.2
miles
Average
speed 13.3 mph
Time
of departure 0950
Time
of arrival 1640
Max
speed - Can't tell as too much water from the rain in the cycle computer!

We've
arrived and Matt looks impressed! - Lots of very UP
Day 4 - Thursday 17th June 2004 - Crianlarich to Ochiltree
The 30 miles of Loch Lomond into Dumbarton was very pleasurable!
Undulating with lots of high speed roads. The weather was good all day
which made the journey along Loch Lomond excellent. As we hit the hussle
and bustle of Glasgow we were really held back. Road works over the Erskin
bridge lost us nearly 30 mins and Matt getting lost just after Glasgow
airport lost us another 20! It was hard going through Paisley because the
map reader didn’t have a clue where he was! (at no point did I get lost
– I just didn’t know where I was)
Once we got back on the A77 towards Kilmarnock and saw the comfort of
the land rover spirits were once again high. Bob met us with pies, mars
bars and plenty of encouragement towards the next pub.
We had to make an unscheduled stop at he “Wee Train” pub in “Galstone”
to watch the England game – strangely enough there seemed to be plenty
of Switzerland supporters with Scots accents!!! Mind you – their
generosity was much against the Scots stereotype. Fantastic! See the
photo. This is where I am writing this update. Another 12 miles to the
B&B after several pints – this could take some time!
I’m back! The last twelve miles were pretty much up-hill as the
locals of the “Wee Train” had the pleasure of telling us. We were
greeted by the pleasing site of “Laigh Tarbeg Farm” and absolutely
palatial working dairy farm and B&B. We couldn’t be made more
welcome, taking our mind off our aching saddle sore! After a fish and chip
supper and a few more beers, off to bed ready for a long, long, long, long
day to Penrith.
Stats
Time in saddle 6 hours 25
minutes
Miles 90.872
Average Speed 14.2 mph
Time of departure 0740
Time of arrival 1945
Max Speed 42.4mph

Gooner asks "What's the Firkin
Point of this bike
ride anyway?" - Dazzlin wants to know if we have taken a wrong turn
somewhere - The Wee Train full of Scottish Switzerland supporters
Day 5 - Friday 18th June 2004 - Ochiltree to Penrith
Reluctantly we left the beautiful
surroundings of the Laigh Tarbeg Farm and its fine hospitality and headed
towards Gods Country. The journey out of Ochiltree was fairly easy going
apart from everyone having sore limbs which were clearly not yet up to
operating temperature( Cuz completed 0.8 miles in one hour at a certain
point!!!).
The next 30 miles were absolute bliss as
they wound down through the foothills of the Scottish Highlands into
Dumfries. More easy cycling continued through Annan and into Gretna where
we anticipated returning to the land of our birth, the land of the great
and hopefully some decent bloody weather!! The obligatory photo shoot took
place at the ‘Welcome to England’ sign where we bade farewell to
Scotland (good riddance more like, its June, why can I see my own breath
for gods sake) and rode, this is no word, of a lie into the clearer,
sunnier and yes, less bleak looking climes of the motherland.
The ride from here on in was bloody
hard, up and down, up and down and up and down and up and down and up and
down until we reached the familiar sight of Penrith.
To surmise: First 80 miles a piece of
cake. Last 24 miles a bastard!! Also all Jelly babies are not the same and
we are off for a curry and a day off tomorrow!!!!
Stats
Time in saddle 6 hrs 55mins
Miles 106.08
Average Speed 15.3 mph
Time of departure 0845
Time of arrival 1930
Max Speed 36.1

Do we have to start again? - Gooner
you can do it, nearly there - At last we're nearly home
Day 6 - Saturday 19th June 2004 - Penrith to nowhere (day off)
The Great Jelly Baby debate!
Over the last 5 days we have had the pleasure of sampling many brands
of jelly baby. Jelly Babies are full of goodness, artificial
colourings, flavours and other artificial stuff. All of this is nice when
riding extreme distances.
The more remote areas do not supply an ample variety of “wee babies”
(said in the accent of the fat Scots bloke from Austin Powers) hence the
desire to report on the merits of “babies”.
Now, all jelly babies are NOT the same!
When faced with a remote Scots village store it is important to decide
which sugary snack will be the most beneficial throughout the day.
Own brand “babies” have proven too chewy and lacking in colour for
endurances purposes. Bassett’s, however, fulfil all the all of the
requirements of such a journey. Their juiciness is unsurpassed and
tenderness incomparable!
During the consumption of such “babies” we have observed the white
dusting of the baby.
We assume that the dusting is added to prevent the “babies” from
sticking together but after much debate we are unsure of the dusting
substance.
Take the time to lick a “baby” and join in the debate. Some critics
believe the dusting to be “icing sugar” others believe it to be “amphetamine”
.
Look at the “baby” photos and post on the guest book which you
think are “bassett’s” and which are “own brand”.
More interesting stuff tomorrow on the way to Wigan.

The great debate, which are Bassetts?
Day 7 - Sunday 20th June 2004 - Penrith to Wigan
Good day with quick runs during the
ride. Matt had a cracking day after suffering slightly during the
first 5 riding days. All was going swimmingly until we reached
Kendall where drama unfolded of such magnitude it had never been seen
before in the town and probably never again. The story will be told
from generation to generation for years to come. Matt's pedal
crankshaft snapped causing him to slip and slice his leg open. Nurse
Sally and Dr. Bob to the rescue.
Matt was taken to hospital and had to endure
several stitches and will rejoin the team on their epic within a day or
so. Going for a few beers tonight in Wigan.
We're planning to start dead early
tomorrow to make sure that we arrive at Telford in time for the footie
match England v Croatia.
Stats
Time in saddle 6 hrs 40mins
Miles 96.4
Average Speed 14.5 mph
Time of departure 0915
Time of arrival 1915
Max Speed 47.3 mph (superb!)

Has anyone seen the sign for
Lancashire? - Has everyone been to the toilet before we start? - Someone
has nicked my tyre!

Do you mind, I was asleep - I thought
the road was a bit bumpy, now I know why
Day 8 - Monday 21st June 2004 -
Wigan to Telford
One of the shorter days mileage wise. Wigan to Telford - an early start
was required to ensure arrival for the England v Croatia game. The early
start meant negotiating the rush hour traffic through the centre of
Warrington in the torrential rain.
We passed John Knight's barge mooring - but no sign of John! 10
miles south of Warrington saw bright sunshine which followed us for the
rest of the day. It really is grim up north. Daz's brother,
Steve, Mum and friend, Dawn, have joined us last night and are currently
working their way through their second bottle of wine. Tonight's
entertainment will include watching Bob and Steve drinking each other to
excess!
COME ON ENGLAND!!!!!
Stats
Time in saddle 5 hrs 20mins
Miles 75.7
Average Speed 14.2 mph
Time of departure 0815
Time of arrival 1700
Max Speed 37.3 mph

Day 9 - Tuesday 22nd June 2004 - Telford
to Chepstow
Left the beauty of Telford early and the first part of the day it was a
breeze. 10 miles before hitting Wales the heavens opened and the terrain
become very hilly with hill after hill after hill. Outrageous!
Absolutely f*****g hate Wales due to crap weather. Not much else
to say about that.
Arrived in Chepstow battered and bruised from the elements but glad to
get there.

Bon voyage Cuz -
Has anyone seen Dazzlin? - Gooner in full action

Time for a
break, me thinks
Day 10 - Wednesday 23rd June 2004 -
Chepstow to Tiverton
Awoke to another gloriously bad day with the wind howling around
us. Left Chepstow and headed towards the Severn Bridge only to find
that it had been closed due to the very bad weather. Really didn't
fancy the stupid amount of miles detour around the River Severn so we
sneaked across. Not sure if we were meant to but sod it.
Weather did not let up all day with the wind in our faces make the
going hard. Roads were fortunately more forgiving with few hills,
normally this would allow averages of around 20mph on these types of
road. We were lucky to be doing 9mph! Whole day lasted 11
hours, not good.
Apparently in other areas of Devon and Somerset trees had been blown
over closing roads! Whose bloody idea was it do cycle from John
O'Groats to Lands End in this direction!!!!!!!!
I want to rant on more about the bloody weather but children might be
reading this so I will save that for later.
Our support crew have made a change, Sally's Dad, Alan, has joined us
on our travels to provide the food and good will, many thanks to Bob for
the fantastic support he has provided up until now.
Suffice to say, this was the worst day so for on the journey with the
only saving grace that there is only one more long day ahead of us and the
prospect of watching England play Portugal will inspire us tomorrow.
Day 11 - Thursday 24th June 2004 - Tiverton
to Bugle
The route itself was difficult leaving Tiverton, extremely, EXTREMELY
hilly the rolling English countryside. Beautiful to look at but an
absolute shister to cycle through!!! After negotiating the difficult
"B" roads we arrived onto the infamous A30 - busy and once again
"rolling". The wind was once again strong. Now - we
expected the wind to be against us throughout - hence the
"suicide" route BUT the past 3 days have seen some of the worst
winds to hit the south west of England since the day before D-Day. 60
bloody years. 60 BLOODY YEARS! Normally the A30 would have been
"ok" but due to the strong winds made very tough going.
The village of Bugle was made in plenty of time to see the England game
and the shocking performance of a certain arse of a referee. I think no
more needs to be said on that.
Stats
Time in saddle 6 hrs 45mins
Miles 79
Average Speed 11.7 mph (due to
high winds!)
Time of departure 0900
Time of arrival 1820
Max Speed 38.3 mph
Day 12 - Friday 25th June 2004 -
Bugle to Penzance
The refereeing decisions put to the back of our minds - we only had 45
miles to go before we met up with friends, relatives and loved ones. By
far and away the best weather of the week! A light breeze (in our face -
as expected!) and the sun was shining (as it still is!)
We soon reintroduced ourselves to the busy A30 and the convoy of
caravans which goes with it. After 30 miles we were greeted by that oh so
familiar welcoming sight of the Legend that is Bob. (from now on to
pronounced "Bhab!" in an extremely loud voice).
As we greeted Cornwall, so the culinary delights of Cornwall greeted
us. Bob (or "Bhab!") supplied us with genuine Cornish pasties -
which were kept piping hot under the bonnet of the Landy and genuine
Cornish Ice Cream! As we enjoyed the delights I heard Gooner say,
"Bob is the sole reason that we are all still alive" and to that
end - I declare that with all the powers vested in me (which ain't a lot -
granted) that from this day forth Bob (or "Bhab!") shall only be
addressed as "SIR BOB".
Enough of that. We are now in a pub garden, training for the last
ten miles tomorrow. We will set off tomorrow at around 11ish which will
give our website administrator time to get here and be in the pub by 1 -
no later!
Stats
Time in saddle 2 hrs 57mins
Miles 45.8
Average Speed 15.5 mph
Time of departure 0940
Time of arrival 1420
Max Speed 38.3 mph
Do we have to
leave to pub? - Lovely Jubbly

We are very
nearly there!
Day 13 - Saturday 26th June 2004 - Penzance
to Lands End!
At last, only ten miles to do before we reach the finishing post.
Several supporters have come to join us as we cross the line. These
supporters also helped us to get some rather nasty hangovers from the
night before.
With only a short distance to travel not a lot to tell apart from thank
f*** it is now over.
Visit the website regularly as there will be new postings showing
a photographic diary of the whole two weeks. For now have a look at
some if these pictures showing the last moments of a long and sometimes
arduous journey.

Nearly there
(Robson get out of the way!) - At last the finish - A happy bunch of lads!

After traveling
around 2000 miles in support of the lads on the trip Bob (or Sir Bhab as
he should be referred to) actually managed to miss the lads crossing the
line as he got lost at the Lands End park!

A combined
effort - Time for a drink I think
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